thinking beyond the 'personal brand'

and the February reading diaries.

I truly despise self-promotion. It makes my skin crawl and often makes me feel a little sick. And this discomfort isn’t just reserved for sharing things about myself online. Oh, no. I have the same physical reactions when a person asks me about myself or my work in an offline setting. I constantly minimise and deflect in these types of conversations, even if my work is worthy of acknowledgement or praise. I even did it when I was speaking on a panel recently, which wasn’t great as I was there to talk about my writing career… I’m fully aware of the sheer irony of this when I work in such a self-promotion and ‘personal brand’ heavy industry. Whether we like it or not, being a writer goes hand in hand with building a ‘brand’, especially a digital one. And I get it. It’s how so many of us get noticed or pick up new work opportunities, projects or even a new job.

But just when you think you know self-promotion as a writer and a journalist, you write a book and you unlock a whole new level — a level I currently find myself in. I want to start by saying, I am deeply grateful that I’ve been given the opportunity to write a book. That is something that will never stop being cool to me. However, promoting a book is a lot. I’ve been talking about and promoting The Othered Woman since it first launched its crowdfunding campaign in 2022. By the time its publication date rolls around later this year, that will be three whole years of self-promo. And as we come up to the publication date, the promotion is only going to grow in intensity.

I’ve been spending a lot of time trying to sit with these feelings of discomfort. What exactly is it about self-promotion that really gets under my skin? One part is feeling as though I’m imposing myself onto others and becoming, quite frankly, a very annoying version of myself. Every time I post something on Instagram about my book or a piece of journalism I worked on, I fully expect to log on to everyone unfollowing and blocking my account. Yet, when I see friends or industry colleagues sharing their work, I’m overjoyed for them. So, maybe it’s in my head. Or maybe, I am just annoying.

Another part is that writing can so easily become your sole identity and the only way you see value in yourself, which then results in this idea of your ‘personal brand’. However, I don’t really want a brand. I want to be able to share enough about my work for it to showcase my writing and talents but not to the point where the only thing I’m known for is a set of particular interests. I like a lot of things!

The major part of my dislike for self-promo though is probably my good friend, imposter syndrome. I recently spoke about this on a podcast but I still feel as though me getting a book deal is a huge fluke. A scam. A fraud. A dream I have not woken up from. I keep describing myself as ‘lucky’ to so many people who ask about the book or even my job as a writer. “I’m not quite sure how I got here” is a phrase I’ve come to rely on. But I do know how I got here. I’ve been doing this for over five years now. I have small moments where I very much back myself but these are rare and that’s sad. In 2025, it’s time for more of these moments.

I guess, the question I ask myself regularly is, can you write for a living without having a ‘personal brand’? Is it even possible? I’m sure there are writers, journalists and authors out there who have a minimal social media presence but how? I’d love to know. Because, one day, I would love to permanently log off.

February reading diaries

• Good Girl by Aria Aber — I’ve never read feelings of shame written so vividly before, truly excellent. A gorgeous book on identity and heritage and one I deeply related to.

• The Love Fix by Rachel Thompson — Such an engaging read. So many relatable ‘lightbulb’ moments about love and modern dating in the current climate. Thoroughly researched but doesn’t read dull at all. In fact, there’s lots of wit in Rachel’s writing.

• Story Of My Life by Lucy Score — A romance that does what it says on the tin. Lucy has an addictive way of writing a love story and I inhaled this one, like I did her previous books.

• Deep End by Ali Hazelwood — I liked reading this but not my favourite Ali Hazelwood book. It was far too long and I didn’t love the ending. And yet, I still finished it.

• Great Big Beautiful Life by Emily Henry — Gripping, beautiful, emotional. Really enjoyed the subplot of this rich famous family as well as the writing of a memoir (you could feel the Succession vibes). The core love story was still wonderful.

• Deep Cuts by Holly Brickley — A really interesting and beautiful love story that has so much depth and musicality woven throughout Holly’s writing. The last third of the novel felt a little slow but a brilliant read.

• Love In Exile by Shon Faye — Expectations were high for this book but my god did it deliver. So captivating in its writing and universal in its themes. I especially adored the chapters on motherhood and friendship.

• Pieces Of Us by Eve Ainsworth — A lovely read that I mistook for a romance novel (that’s on me) but it’s in fact a story on grief, friendship and love.

• All Fours by Miranda July — So wonderfully weird and interesting. I especially loved how Miranda explores desire and independence in your perimenopausal years. The last third of the novel fell apart a little for me but didn’t take away too much from the general feel of it.

• Logging Off by Adele Zeynep Walton — Adele has beautifully interwoven her own experiences and campaigning with the wider cultural and social harms of the digital world. Logging Off is a book that I think *every* single person should read. I learned so much and it’s definitely made me think a lot about my own digital life and social media (over)use.